Ode To Friendship...Or Lack Thereof

We've been friends for how long now?
Been quite some time.
Maybe not from birth or childhood,
But a few years have passed now.

We've been through our share of trials, yes,
Plenty of ups and downs.
Our ups were so high and our downs so low,
But after all, who's isn't?

We had a rough go, not even a year ago.
There were not many words.
We didn't talk for months on end.
And when we did it was short and cold.

Now you're back, maybe back to stay?
With you I never know.
One day you're here, the next gone
Why can't you just make up your mind?

It's hard not to be angry and bitter.
It's harder to stay.
I've tried to prove that I'll be true
Tried to undo the wrongs of the past.

Tried to prove that I've changed
Changed inside now.
I'm wholly different, new, and clean
I know I'm forgiven for my past.

You know how to cut me deep
Make it hurt bad
It's like a knife that you twist
Deeper and deeper on purpose.

Do I love too much? Care too much?
Sensitive too much?
Do you try to make me tough?
Maybe make me stand up taller?

But really? Must you try so hard?
I've tried my best.
What is a good friend for?
If not to be there when you cry.

You went and listed friends to me
Your best friends
And yet my name wasn't on that list
Somehow I didn't make the final cut.

The cut of your best and truest friends
Ones you could trust.
How could it be? That I have stayed
To end up being quietly dismissed.

Do you even see me as a friend?
A loyal companion?
You haven't stooped to recognized me
Or seemed proud that you know me.

It's like I'm invisible to your friends
Or like I don't exist
Because those closest and dearest to you
Haven't ever heard you speak my name.

So here's to me maybe moving on
To bigger better things?
Or perhaps I'll still stick around
Am I a glutton for punishment?

Maybe I'm the true friend here
Sticking around
If you still want it, I'm here
Just make an effort to talk to me.

Whenever we talk, please speak words
Lots and lots!
Make me feel like you want us.
Show me that friends still are loyal.

I can't promise I'll be here forever.
People do move on.
Taken for granted isn't friendship
And watch, someday, I might be gone.