Whom shall I trust but Thee?

I have been told on several accounts that I trust far too many people and far too often. Whether this is true or not, I know I can trust a specific Someone without fail. The HPA cast list came out early this morning and I woke up the very moment the email was sent to my inbox...I know this was God's plan and will. I was extremely disappointed when I didn't get any of the roles I had wanted to. Now, before the cast list came out, I had made a choice to not do HPA if I didn't get in or get on the devotions committee. This is because since this is my senior year I will already be very busy and need to prioritize my time better. As of right now it's very probable I won't do HPA, but there is a slight chance. The Lord's Will is ultimate however, and I must rely upon that for comfort. I must trust wholly upon my Savior to know what's best for me. To round off this post I'd like to add some "trusting" Bible verses. They will guard me and my heart for the upcoming weeks as I prepare to submit entirely to my God and King.

Proverbs 3:5-6

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. ”

Psalm 118:8

“It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.”

Philippians 4:7

“And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Psalm 31:14-15

“But as for me, I trust in You, O LORD; I say, “You are my God.”
My times are in Your hand;”

Psalm 20: 7-8

“Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.They are brought to their knees and fall, but we rise up and stand firm.”

Psalm 27:1

“The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?”

Psalm 22:4

“Our fathers trusted in thee: they trusted, and thou didst deliver them.”

Isaiah 50:10 “Who is among you that fears the LORD, That obeys the voice of His servant, That walks in darkness and has no light? Let him trust in the name of the LORD and rely on his God.”

Psalm 46:1

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.”

Psalm 59:16

“But I will sing of your strength, in the morning I will sing of your love; for you are my fortress, my refuge in times of trouble.”

Isaiah 40:28-29
“Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength.

Isaiah 41:10
“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Nehemiah 8:10
“Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.”

1 Corinthians 1:25
“For the foolishness of God is wiser than man’s wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man’s strength.”

Yes, I stole this...

I found this beautiful poem...written by one of my friends. I stole it without him knowing but it was so absolutely stunning that it brought tears to my eyes. Enjoy!

They shot him down and he fell to his knees
Crying to the world, "somebody help me please!"

He begged for mercy and they tore him apart
He took a bullet straight through the heart

Before they killed him he did one thing
He made a promise to a girl by giving her ring


She watched him die as he fell to the ground
Not a tear was shed and there wasn't a sound

She walked up to the killers and and she gave them a look
She said she forgave them for the life they took

She told them about the man who paid their price
And on that day they met Christ

the early bird?

So today I'm up much earlier then I usually am and decided today will be a big day for me. I'm up early so I am a little more tired then usual with a headache thrown in the mix, but after some water and some food, I'm sure it'll be all fixed. I want to get a lot accomplished today. My mum needs more help around the house and I spend too much time lazing about just reading books and playing on my iPod so today will be a big day of doing stuff for her and just cleaning up in general. I found this beautiful psalm this morning that speaks of dominion being given to men and how we are to take it and use it to the best of God's glory. I want to post that here for y'all to enjoy! :)

Psalm 8:4-9

⁴What is man, that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man, that thou visitest him?

⁵For thou hast made him a little lower than the angels, and hast crowned him with glory and honour.

⁶Thou madest him to have dominion over the works of thy hands; thou hast put all things under his feet:

⁷All sheep and oxen, yea, and the beasts of the field;

⁸The fowl of the air, and the fish of the sea, and whatsoever passeth through the paths of the seas.

⁹O LORD our Lord, how excellent is thy name in all the earth!

David was blessed

One of my favorite books of the Bible is definitely Psalms. The book just breathes the words of peace into your heart as you read them. Both repentance and peace. They can easily convict you of your sin and your wickedness but turn around and just as easily sooth you as a Father would a hurt and sorry child. This is the one book I can turn to when I'm troubled or stressed or anything and I leave feeling 100%. God is such a great Father and He does know exactly what is right for any child that needs guidance or peace and calming. One of my first Psalms I memorized was Psalm 103...it's so beautiful and it covers many grounds. It has really come across in these years to me and made me remember my blessings. Ah, the things you learn in Sunday School really do come back and assist you in the years to come!

Psalm 103

1 Praise the LORD, O my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.

2 Praise the LORD, O my soul,
and forget not all his benefits-

3 who forgives all your sins
and heals all your diseases,

4 who redeems your life from the pit
and crowns you with love and compassion,

5 who satisfies your desires with good things
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

6 The LORD works righteousness
and justice for all the oppressed.

7 He made known his ways to Moses,
his deeds to the people of Israel:

8 The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in love.

9 He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbor his anger forever;

10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.

11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;

12 as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

13 As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;

14 for he knows how we are formed,
he remembers that we are dust.

15 As for man, his days are like grass,
he flourishes like a flower of the field;

16 the wind blows over it and it is gone,
and its place remembers it no more.

17 But from everlasting to everlasting
the LORD's love is with those who fear him,
and his righteousness with their children's children-

18 with those who keep his covenant
and remember to obey his precepts.

19 The LORD has established his throne in heaven,
and his kingdom rules over all.

20 Praise the LORD, you his angels,
you mighty ones who do his bidding,
who obey his word.

21 Praise the LORD, all his heavenly hosts,
you his servants who do his will.

22 Praise the LORD, all his works
everywhere in his dominion.
Praise the LORD, O my soul.

Future...is future

So lately I've really been thinking more and more about getting a degree in the library field and going to work more full time somewhere...but that requires a degree (duh) and go away to college. There are only two colleges in MI that offer that kind of degree. U of M and Wayne State. I would never submit myself to U of M...for obvious reasons that I'm a firm and devout State fan, but I would really enjoy attending Wayne State. Last night I researched Wayne State a little...I'd be gone from home a distance of a little under 2 hours. So I'd have to board down there. I'm still praying about this...it's all in the works, but I ran some numbers last night and am really at a loss of how to get all the money for it. Today I spent some quality devotional time and came across this Psalm...reading it slowly helped me out a lot and I found that God spoke this especially to me today. I want to post it here. Not all the verses directly applied, but some did and those were the ones that really struck me.

Psalm 37

¹ Do not fret because of evildoers,
Nor be envious of the workers of iniquity.
² For they shall soon be cut down like the grass,
And wither as the green herb.

³ Trust in the LORD, and do good;
Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.
⁴ Delight yourself also in the LORD,
And He shall give you the desires of your heart.

⁵ Commit your way to the LORD,
Trust also in Him,
And He shall bring it to pass.
⁶ He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light,
And your justice as the noonday.

⁷ Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him;
Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way,
Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass.
⁸ Cease from anger, and forsake wrath;
Do not fret—it only causes harm.

⁹ For evildoers shall be cut off;
But those who wait on the LORD,
They shall inherit the earth.
¹⁰ For yet a little while and the wicked shall be no more;
Indeed, you will look carefully for his place,
But it shall be no more.
¹¹ But the meek shall inherit the earth,
And shall delight themselves in the abundance of peace.

¹² The wicked plots against the just,
And gnashes at him with his teeth.
¹³ The Lord laughs at him,
For He sees that his day is coming.
¹⁴ The wicked have drawn the sword
And have bent their bow,
To cast down the poor and needy,
To slay those who are of upright conduct.
¹⁵ Their sword shall enter their own heart,
And their bows shall be broken.

¹⁶ A little that a righteous man has
Is better than the riches of many wicked.
¹⁷ For the arms of the wicked shall be broken,
But the LORD upholds the righteous.

¹⁸ The LORD knows the days of the upright,
And their inheritance shall be forever.
¹⁹ They shall not be ashamed in the evil time,
And in the days of famine they shall be satisfied.
²⁰ But the wicked shall perish;
And the enemies of the LORD,
Like the splendor of the meadows, shall vanish.
Into smoke they shall vanish away.

²¹ The wicked borrows and does not repay,
But the righteous shows mercy and gives.
²² For those blessed by Him shall inherit the earth,
But those cursed by Him shall be cut off.

²³ The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD,
And He delights in his way.
²⁴ Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down;
For the LORD upholds him with His hand.

²⁵ I have been young, and now am old;
Yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken,
Nor his descendants begging bread.
²⁶ He is ever merciful, and lends;
And his descendants are blessed.

²⁷ Depart from evil, and do good;
And dwell forevermore.
²⁸ For the LORD loves justice,
And does not forsake His saints;
They are preserved forever,
But the descendants of the wicked shall be cut off.
²⁹ The righteous shall inherit the land,
And dwell in it forever.

³⁰ The mouth of the righteous speaks wisdom,
And his tongue talks of justice.
³¹ The law of his God is in his heart;
None of his steps shall slide.

³² The wicked watches the righteous,
And seeks to slay him.
³³ The LORD will not leave him in his hand,
Nor condemn him when he is judged.

³⁴ Wait on the LORD,
And keep His way,
And He shall exalt you to inherit the land;
When the wicked are cut off, you shall see it.
³⁵ I have seen the wicked in great power,
And spreading himself like a native green tree.
³⁶ Yet he passed away,^[a] and behold, he was no more;
Indeed I sought him, but he could not be found.

³⁷ Mark the blameless man, and observe the upright;
For the future of that man is peace.
³⁸ But the transgressors shall be destroyed together;
The future of the wicked shall be cut off.

³⁹ But the salvation of the righteous is from the LORD;
He is their strength in the time of trouble.
⁴⁰ And the LORD shall help them and deliver them;
He shall deliver them from the wicked,
And save them,
Because they trust in Him.

School? Busy?

I am contemplating whether to begin school or not this week...I'm a little bored...but whenever I'm bored it seems like I'm not bored. And whenever I'm not bored it seems like I am. I'm always doing something? But at the same time I'm not doing something vitally important. Hmm...decisions!

Beautiful books!

So just lately because of my job at the library, I have been getting much more books then I would have usually gotten. I saw this one author that looked like she wrote good books and they also appeared to be Christian fiction. Now...most Christian fiction I have read in the past is mushy nonsense that mixes Christianity with conformity so it ends up not coming across as Christianity in the least. But I got this book, hopeful that it might be different. Lord be praised, it was! The first book I read was the retelling of Rebecca, Isaac, Jacob, Esau, Leah, and Rachel. It was such a beautiful story and I found my eyes filled with tears at the end. I didn't have the second book in the sequel, but I did have the third so I began that yesterday. I can honestly say that I couldn't put it down. This one was the story of Dinah, Shechem, Levi, and Simeon (with Leah and Jacob added in too). This book was even better then the first one...I was absolutely sobbing by the end. There have been plenty of sad movies and books that I've read in the past, but I've never ever cried as hard as I did last night. It was just so moving and also so sad that you can't help but cry! The author is Liz Curtis Higgs and the first book was Thorn in my Heart, the second book is Grace in Thine eyes. Beautiful books and I fully recommend them to you!

oh and...

I feel the need to let you all know that I did get the job I had been praying for! I now work at the Charlotte Community Library and am so blessed by it. Getting to know all the ladies there and also growing in my work experience has been so amazing! The steady income with the combined advantage of free movies and new books I'd never seen before is something I really appreciate. God is so bounteous and merciful. I truly can't imagine a better job and God granted me this all! Praise God from whom *all* blessings flow!

The Beauty of Baptism and other adventures

Last week was full…full of surprises and fun times! My 16^th birthday was last Sunday (a week and a day ago) and I spent it with my church family in the morning and my biological family (grandparents) in the evening. I had such a great time celebrating not only my birthday but my grandma’s, which is the day after mine.

Monday, I woke up early and was told I had a “doctor’s appointment”. My mum drove me up to the Mason area but dropped me off at the Ingham County Fair to spend the day with Madison. We both had so much fun. She had several horse shows throughout the day and it was nice to finally be able to see her show. We didn’t have a ton of time to hang out or do much, but what time we did have was so much fun. Then I had my real doctor’s appointment before coming home and simply crashing.

Tuesday was a bit more relaxed. I woke up late and kind of lazed around until 11 or so when Rachel took me up to Lansing for some sisterly “shopping” which consisted of dropping me off at Emily’s house. We spent the next few hours just talking and talking. It was nice to finally be able to catch up with her and get to take pictures of her! Also, I got to go to work (I love my job).

Wednesday, phew, I still say that with a smile…I was kidnapped for the first time in my whole life. Not only that, but it was done with me blindfolded. At 9 am on the dot, I was promptly blindfolded by my gleeful siblings and grabbed and stuffed into our van. Just as we pulled out of the driveway the blindfold was pulled off to reveal Libby! She had me for the majority of the day. We headed straight up to the Eastwood Town Center and watched the newest Winnie the Pooh (you all better be really jealous at this point). Oh. My. Word. It was so amazing! I had totally forgotten just how fantastic Pooh is! Well, not just Pooh, but Winnie the Pooh in general! After that we went over and hung out at Schuler’s for a bit just browsing. Lunch was spent at Johnny Rocket’s (a sort of retro place with coke signs on the wall and booths and stools at the counter where you can eat and all that amazing cool old stuff) and boy, that was so different and FUN. I want to go back! We then went over to American Eagle and just browsed there too before heading home. It was a very exciting day.

Thursday was much more relaxed…no super big surprises. I just had fun cleaning and reading books and such. I also began to prepare for HPA auditions. That evening, however, my mum took me out to get ice cream with my da at Dairy Queen.

Friday, I got to be home alone for the morning and most of the afternoon because other people were out and about at auditions and work and such. I had my HPA auditions from 4-7 with a call back from 7:30-10. Honestly, I don’t want to think or talk about how I did or how I think I went or anything related to that until the cast list comes out. I don’t want to form any kind of opinion on how I did until that point. But it was so nice to be able to see all my friends again! I got home late to be surprised with Toria spending the weekend! We stayed up a little late (or early, take your pick) just talking and getting all caught up.

Saturday was a busy day. The morning involved a tiny bit of work. My da had a couple guys over to help get our old sliding back door out and put a nice shiny new one in. I left for work with Toria and was away for a while. Work was so much fun because...well, it was “Fun Day” at the library. I had to wear these little kids plastic star sunglasses most of the time and little stretchy bracelet. We left from there with Rakie and Jon to get some Subway and go shopping! We went to Goodwill and I was so happy with the clothes I got there. Next stop: Biggbys. After that we headed home and just did chores and work for the rest of the day before watching Letters to Juliet and Night and Day. Another night was before us so we did spend most of it up talking again. I love that girl; I’m just going to put that out there!

Sunday was well spent also. Church was so beautiful…I still can’t get over it. We had two people become members of the church and their five children baptized along with communion and the regular service. Never the less, I don’t know what it was but during the baptisms I had tears spring to my eyes…I don’t normally get that emotional during church, but it was so touching to me to be reminded of how great our baptisms are. They form us and shape us to become the individual we turn out to be. Watching those children as they stood, unknowing of the grandness that was behind it all, I was touched by just how great, forgiving, and merciful our God is to us. Those moments are the ones I treasure always and I have a feeling that this feeling of awe and speechlessness at God’s grandeur is not something likely to pass quickly. Even tonight as I sat in evening church I was once again taken back by the situation of God’s love towards us. It was so great and magnificent that I know I will be on fire for Him and ready to jump out of bed every single Sunday for a long time eager to go and just grow in Christ. The “on fire” moments are so amazing and I thank God for my church and my church family. I left thinking to myself, “It was good to be in the house of the Lord!” May God grant you such “on fire” moments. Last night, I also began to organize our bookshelf since I've begun this new library job and am all about the organizing of books. That took a very long time and is still not completely finished, but I do feel as if it were much more organized then before.

a response to a recent Facebook status that I wasn't allowed to post

I find it humorous how debaters against Stephen are all attacking Stephen rather violently while turning around to speak about how we must love and accept homosexuals and/or gays. Isn’t that a tad contradictory? Aren’t you being picky with who you choose to love and speak kindly to?

The government’s main priority right now is to gain complete control of the people which is begun with the mind. They train the mind to think a certain way and they can eventually take over without a fight. They infiltrate their devious ideas into the public schools…into children growing and learning and forming an opinion on the world. This is one reason why public schools should be shut down. The government’s goal at the moment is to get us to all believe that being different is ok. Not being Biblical is ok. Therefore it’s ok if you’re gay…it’s ok if you’re Muslim…we’ll still accept you. The only way to raise children with a full education that glorifies the Lord while training their minds to think in Christian ways and not with a socialistic mindset is to homeschool them.

The Bible does cover the issue of homosexuality very clearly…many times whether you choose to see it or not. When God says “A man shall leave his parents and shall cleave to his wife” shouldn’t he just also include as a P.S. “and he can also cleave to his husband.”? No…so do we just get to slide that in between the paragraphs? NO. God’s word is clear and very complete. It means just what it says and nothing is to be added to that.

God made man…God made woman. He made no feminine men and no masculine women. He mad no half-breeds of women and men. He made no in betweens. He made them man and woman. No person is born a homosexual…it is purely a choice.

Are you going to accept everyone for the person they are? Are you going to accept the person who rapes you because they are just born with that instinct? Are you going to accept the murderer who killed your parents because that’s just who they are? Are you going to accept the person who going against God’s clear law because they just are that way and we are commanded to “love them”?

If you love something you must hate its opposite. If you love sin then you must hate good. Is being a homosexual good? Is it really? Well if God’s word condemns it, it probably isn’t good, right? So let’s get an answer to 1+1. We are called to turn away from sin…rebuke those who dwell in it and wallow around with it like pigs in mud. Homosexuality is a choice…not something you are born with. They choose to live every day of their life in that mud, and we are called to warn them of their sin but if they will not listen then to leave them be to enjoy that muck and mire. It will turn out to be their own hell because no one can truly enjoy sin.

Rape is rape…against men or little boys as opposed to women makes *no* difference. All is evil and should be abhorred.

One way I’ve noticed you love to jab at Stephen is by calling him ignorant, being mean, cruel, unjust or even “not using your brain”, “smart ass” or “on crack”. That’s the general idea I’m getting…am I right?

I wrote up a paper and did a complete study on this next subject so please don’t call me ignorant in this arena. Scripture clearly states that the father is the head of the household…the leader. He is to “train up his children” and to guide them to the paths of righteousness…not as a savior or a salvation, but as a leader and director to God’s will. It’s just his job. So now why should he ship his children off to a class led by a teacher who has different views and teaches them in an unbiblical setting all day every week day? Isn’t that going against God’s direct instruction for a father?

God does not mince words with those dwelling, living, and basking in sin. They go to hell. No big shocker there. I think we know those who sin and do not repent go to hell…if you don’t agree with that…wow. Ok but moving on…when we accept homosexuals for who they are and the choices they’ve made (or if you’d prefer to call it the nature they were born with) we are in essence encouraging them to live in sin because it’s ok…we’ll still love you and accept you. Are you going to tell a murder “Hey, it’s ok…I’ll still accept you if you kill all my friends and family”? NO, you’ll hate him and condemn him for his great sin. Homosexuality is still a sin. Now are you going to go get your “sin scales” out and say that murder is a direct violation of the 10 commandments and as such is worse then homosexuality (if you even agree that’s a sin.)? Ha…that one is just laughable. There are no black, white, and gray sins. They are all as black as you can get. There are no lesser sins…if I commit 2 gray sins and a white sin, am I more righteous then you who may commit 2 black sins and 2 white sins? That’s just absolutely dumb if you agree with that. There are no lesser or greater sins. All are equal. Homosexuality is sin.

Tessa, you said “Haha like I said the words here are actually very ambiguous and probably referring to male prostitutes and pederasty! Search it up.” I’m very happy you included the word “probably” or else something else would be coming your way. I’m also glad you don’t claim to know the Bible that well. The Bible is not code. It’s not in a foreign language…God says what He says for a reason. When he says the word “sodomite” or “homosexual” I’m pretty sure it’s not some code word for “male prostitution”. He would have said that if He meant it. And yes, I have heard of gays with AIDS purposefully giving blood in order to get it spread around. It’s not just some figment of Stephen’s imagination or something he’s making up. I don’t believe it’s very correct for you to jab at Stephen hinting that he may be scared that’s he’s wrong. It’s always best to know your sources and not act like a “know it all” like most of you are doing. He simply wants to point you in the right direction. Be appreciative of help. Or should I say…be accepting of him for who he is? Sound familiar? Also, your sarcasm does you no flattery, I should let you know.

Tessa, women are not leaders. Men are the ultimate leaders and as such should be the leaders not only in their homes but at church. You cannot surely call me a sexist when I say that women have no right to speak out at church, but rather consult their husband or father in their home. Women should never be preachers, pastors, or elders in any circumstance or situation. That is simply not their place. It’s not slavery and it shouldn’t be a task for you (unless you are unbiblical). Women are far more biased then men are and can be very easily deceived. Obviously we are all fallen and as such we all make mistakes. But women do tend to fall easier prey to many things.

God hates…get used to it. There’s no way you can ignore the hundreds of verses speaking of God’s wrath and hatred. Oh or will you just pass them up by saying that God hates the sin but loves the sinner? Wow…dumb. And abhor does mean hate. Look it up…they’re synonyms.

Scripture is the ultimate go to when seeking correction. I advise you to start there if you have questions. If you want to call me a coward by all means go for it.