Life and Guilt

Yesterday and today have both been eventful and very full days. Yesterday, I woke up and had work first off. The house was empty and I had a list made up for me to do. It was so very pleasant to just have the house to myself...quiet and peaceful. No time to rush or hurry though chores, no one to be waiting on me to be done so they can do their stuff. I did a bunch of laundry and unpacking as well as general clean-up and vacuuming. I was able to just blast my music and chill without worrying about feeling self-conscious about anyone watching. It was a little nerve frazzling sometimes though when I heard a creak in this strange new house.

Then I went home and did some good transcribing work. I am finding myself more and more encouraged by that work. I know God is using this work to bless others and for me to learn more increasingly about Him. But yes, it was a blessing to do that. I also fixed a little bit of food before headed off to L'Abri. We had such an enjoyable evening learning more about God and His great sovereignty and rule over all. I also got to color a bit in our Winnie the Pooh coloring book with Aimee.

One of the biggest joys of yesterday was that I made a new friend in Christ. She is a real light in my life already. She speaks the word of Christ to me and uplifts me to our Heavenly Father in prayer and supplication. I know God placed her in my life to grow me up more in His ways and to bring others to Christ and to be able to more confidently be proud of the God that I serve.

Today I worked for about five straight hours, just cleaning the house. It was mostly empty and those who were home knew to stay out of my way (Sarah has cleaning fits - don't argue!). So now the house is sparkling...okay, not really...I could honestly spend days and days just cleaning this house and never be done. By the time I was feeling absolutely exhausted, people started coming back home and by now I feel like all my work is pretty undone! After all that I got some good mowing in and then my mum, da, Becca and I all loaded up to go see this wood chipper which we ended up getting. Ever since then it's been a quiet evening of just relaxing at home. Now it's just my mum and I just resting here at home. All in all it's been a wildly productive day...a huge blessing since I've felt rather lazy and useless around the home this past week.

One big thing that God has been showing me is how the devil uses guilt against us humans. We mess up and are pretty faulty...but God is so gracious, merciful, and forgiving that even though we sin and make HUGE mistakes, He never holds it over us or tries to blackmail us in any fashion. When we do feel overburdened and weighed down by our guilt, it is only Satan working against us to draw us away from our loving Father. He has forgiven us! If we truly repent and turn away from our sin in a desperate effort to be better then there is no excuse why we cannot be forgiven 100%...not 99% with God coming back to remind us of how awful and sinful we are...but entirely, completely, and fully...our sins have been paid and forgiven!

What kind of desperate joy should that bring to us! What bright smiles should be on our faces! Just knowing that I am absolutely spotless before the throne of grace and before my Father in heaven...that relieves the heavy burden of sin. I know that the dark side has *nothing* to hold over my head. Even if Satan hasn't forgotten my sin, I know God has truly forgiven it and promised me eternal life with Him if I truly repent and seek to do better in the future. God grant that all of us may have this sweet assurance and peace of forgiveness and living a guilt-free life!